Couldn’t go to Glastonbury this year and have severe FOMO? But we’ve got a solution – recreate the magic of Glastonbury with a takeaway, a paddling pool and a well-crafted Spotify playlist.

1. Fill up a paddling pool

Rule 1, stay cool and hydrated. That means basking in the sunshine in your private pool. What could be better? It just so happens this pool is plastic, inflatable and has a very nice octopus pattern.

2.Have drink confiscated

For the proper festival experience, bring as much as booze as you can carry. But when you get back from the supermarket, leave half of it at your front door, to because of Glasto’s refusal to let you smuggle so much booze in. Next, leave whatever is left out in the sun – anyone fancy a refreshing, toasty warm beer?

3. Pay double for burgers

This is an easy one. Because paying a bleary eyed hippie £12 for a burger is one of Glasto’s proudest traditions, so how about buying a takeaway as normal on JUST EAT, but hand over twice as much as you normally would. When the driver goes to give you your change, just shout, ‘Don’t worry! I’T’S GLASTONBURY!’ He’ll be confused, but he’ll appreciate the tip.


4. Wear wellies

Who cares what the weather’s like? Just bust out your best pair of old man wellies, and refuse to take them off all weekend. Sorted.

5. Actually listen to Glastonbury

We nearly forgot about the music. If you’re dead serious about it, the good old BBC are going to be broadcasting the whole thing live on the radio — so just grab your laptop, your phone or your tablet and tune into whatever tickles your fancy. They’ve got coverage from BBC Radio 1 to 6music, so whether it’s Arcade Fire, Skrillex or Fatboy Slim you’ll be sure to find whatever you fancy.